Saturday, February 18, 2006

2 seconds that make up for any 2 months

Before we moved from Seattle, Ed's mom gave me the blanket he had as a baby. It's a warm blanket knitted by a neighbor, and I assume, friend.

The blanket is in the shape of a rectangle; knitted with soft cotton yarn, predominately white with thick green and yellow stripes. When I go in around 10:00 at night to cover Jack up from the shoulders down, more than half of the blanket lies beyond his feet. I have to go in and cover him up in one of his deep sleep modes, because if he's even slightly awake, he'll kick the blanket off. With our Boston nights often hitting a high of 9 degrees, I can't sleep beneath my down comforter knowing that Jack might be anything less than perfectly warm - even if he only leaves the blanket on until his next light sleep cycle.

When we unpacked last August, I put Ed's baby blanket in the crib drawer, partly because it was special and partly because it is so big that I was worried Jack could get tangled up in it. Besides, I was more worried about keeping Jack cool then. But, as the New England weather grew cold (and our heating bills up), I wanted to have something warm for the little guy.

The other night, I went in to cover up Jack and I couldn't find the (knitted) blanket (I always leave it at the foot of the crib). I thought maybe I had taken it out when I changed the sheet and forgot to put it back in. He has another blanket in there, a kind of "decoy" for his real blankie (we've been hoping to introduce it as "blankie two" for when blankie uno shreds apart). Decoy blankie used to be the only "cover up blanket" until I'd go in and Jack would be sleeping on it and I couldn't pull it out without waking him up- and then he'd see me, get upset, I'd leave him (crying) and, of course, without a cover: another reason that I got out Ed's baby blanket- to have a back up blanket to cover Jack up with.

For the first time, Jack had moved his dad's baby blanket from the foot of the crib to the head of the crib. His entire body was sleeping next to the blanket, almost as if he was being spooned by it. Before the other night, he'd never even acknowledged this blanket. Maybe they've been getting to know one another after I'd tuck him in; maybe he's gotten used to the feel of it in the deepest of his sleeps. All I know is that when I went in to cover him up and saw him cuddled up next to his father's blanket- chosen by his gorgeous Jack hands to be right up there with Blue, Puppy, and Elmo, well, I swear all those weeks and months of helping the kid sleep on his own (nearly a year ago now) was all worth it. I like that he's sleeping with the blanket that Ed used; I like that 30+ years after his dad snuggled up to it with no doubt his mom concerned with is warmth (too much, like me, no doubt), Jack is now, with no language and no conscious understanding of the history of that blanket, made it his sleep buddy. Coincidence? Maybe. But, decoy blanket has never been so intimately place, nor has the half dozen other stuffed animals that remain at the foot of the crib.

I was able to life up the end of the long side of the blanket and lay it over him, perfectly, peacefully.

Gotta love legacy.

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